Friday, 29 July 2016

Nothing

Do you know what is my favorite day? It would be Saturday.

Why Saturday? Do you party?

Party? Oh, no! Not anymore. I like Saturday because i don't have anything lined up first thing on Sunday. I don't have to set an alarm. I can get up as late as 8 am.

8 am isn't late.

For me it's great late.

What do you do Saturday night?

I don't do anything.

You don't watch the television?

No.

Listen to songs?

I stopped listening to random songs. The meanings had become ridiculous.

You don't go out?

No. I like to be on my own.

Gosh. You call this living?

Well, yes. I compare myself with other people. There are those who're suffering. Some from illnesses. Some from poverty. Some from extraordinary expectations which gives them extraordinary disappointment.

So...

So i don't waste my time unnecessarily. I do lots of work. I do many kinds of work. And, I live a very simple life.

Why did you make such a decision? Were you terribly disappointed over something?

Not really. I discovered expectations are my worst enemy. So, I started giving up. I started giving up good clothes, expensive food, branded items. As the need of other people increased, mine decreased.

Why?

I got tired of demanding people. Tired of them taking all the time. I stopped communicating. Simply because it was less antagonising. I preferred simple people. They said no all the time. Even for basic needs. I like seeing them change. The metamorphosis gives me the adrenaline to keep moving.

You shouldn't waste time on these people. Its their fate that they're like this.

Fate can be changed. I've made it happen. Having money helps though. Many things can be done.

You're planning to be like this for good?

Yes. I made a discovery. I have a weakness. Perhaps it's another disorder. I don't get angry at all. That makes me a prey. When good fuses with bad, the good gets sutured. Hurt. Often it's unfair kind of hurt. It's slowly destroying me. My defense is to stay away.

What's your future plan?

Nothing. For now I'm going to be quiet. Delve in my pain. Experience it. Enjoy it. Understand it. If i disappear into nothingness, fine. If i evolve into another butterfly from this cocoon. Fine too. For the time being silence is going to be my best friend. I like it this way.

I hope you find peace and happiness.

Thank you but I'm not searching for anything for now.





No comments:

Post a Comment